Your controller’s acting up, eh?
Alright, so here we are, nose-deep in the chaos that is Radio Free Nintendo. We’ve got this unwavering affection for the Big Ape, right? Seriously, it’s practically ingrained in our lore. Oh, those old Now Playing segments we had—POOF, gone! Yet, the love for DK stays rock solid.
Anyway—or wait, was I saying something else? Oh, right—pondering over “The Big Ape” as a moniker for Donkey Kong led me down a rabbit hole. You see, I love getting distracted. And now for something completely serious: Here’s what The Center for Great Apes says apes are all about.
First off, they’ve got hair, not fur. DK’s hairdo says it all—like, how does it keep growing like that? Then there are fingernails because his fists sometimes open up and—yep, nails. Now, those opposable thumbs? Check. It seems apes come with smart brains; DK ties his tie, rides rhinos—I mean, have you seen a marmot do that? Didn’t think so.
Prehensility—again, those handy fists. Padded digits with fingerprints? The jury’s still out, folks. And binocular vision? Without it, his punchy lifestyle wouldn’t hold up. So, DK ticks a bunch of ape boxes, alright.
But wait!—the biggest surprise from The Center is people mix up apes and monkeys. Apes are bigger, smarter, don’t have tails, blah blah. Monkeys have tails. Guess what, Diddy? No tail-less club membership for you. DK’s sticking around longer. Sorry, Diddy, but… boohoo.
Now, about that Donkey Kong Bananza Direct on Wednesday. Gameplay, story stuff—DK’s sidekick is Pauline, the teen. WHOA. Lore fans are spinning. It’s juicy, but hey, everyone’s memed it to death. Key takeaways:
1. Pauline = human = ape. Voilà.
2. Diddy = not ape.
3. Diddy’s checkout time arrives before DK’s.
It’s like DK’s on the lookout for Diddy’s replacement—oof, the doomed Diddy dilemma.
Switching gears, James rambles about Fantasy Life i: The Girl Who Steals Time. It’s all systems and “lives.” Ore mining, saws, trees, tools—until somehow, you get a mighty weapon. Brain mush. Help!
After that mental gym class, a break was essential. Back to business—Jon, the console hoarder, tried cashing in at GameStop. Special Agent Steve from InfoSec? Haha, didn’t see that coming. Greg’s got updates on Mario Kart World and F-Zero GX. So, are Switch 2’s biggies really racing games? They’ve got fresh solo stuff.
Guillaume and James tried GameChat on Switch 2. Streaming gems like Mario Kart and F-Zero GX—they threw in Fantasy Life i, too. Also, Switch 2 Pro Controller? Hands on!
Wrapping up, we wanted to do a little Lister Mail, diving into marketing campaigns for Mario Kart World brands. Have ideas? Send them!
Oh, and about calling Donkey Kong “The Big Ape”… It’s more like a nickname, not an actual title or epithet. Someday, I’ll figure this stuff out—probably when I’m six feet under. But hey, who needs to learn anything now, right?
