Sure thing. Here’s a humanized spin on the article:
—
Okay, so bear with me here because this is kind of wild. Microsoft just decided to jack up the prices on their Xbox Series S and X consoles, along with all the fun stuff like controllers, headsets—you name it. I guess “market conditions” and whatever costs have gone up or something. Now, if you’re eyeing an Xbox Series X, it’s gonna set you back $599.99. Yeah, not cheap. And first-party games? They’ll be $79.99. That’s like a nice dinner out, poof, gone. Weirdly, Xbox Game Pass is staying put at the same price.
So, Microsoft’s like, “Hey, from May 1, our consoles and controllers are more expensive. Expect games to be $79.99 around the holidays.” Why would they time it like that? No clue, maybe they want us to sell a kidney during Christmas—I kid, I kid.
Now, here’s the kicker, the Xbox Series X with 1TB is up to $599.99, a $100 hop. The fancier 2TB SSD Galaxy Black dude is now a whopping $729.99. That’s like a small fortune for me! Oh, and if you’re into the Series S, the 512GB version is now $379.99 while the 1TB is $429.99. It’s all gone a bit nuts, honestly.
There’s this table with all the prices, but who even looks at those? I mean, I should, but maybe I’m just too rattled right now. Anyway, headsets are up to $119.99. Nintendo’s been doing the $79.99 game thing with Mario Kart, so maybe that’s where Microsoft got the idea.
And it’s not just the U.S. feeling the hit. Europe’s in on it too, thanks to their trusty import tariffs and whatnot. Microsoft says it’s all about development costs and trade policies, yada yada, but who really knows?
And just when I was losing hope, I heard Xbox Game Pass prices aren’t changing. Not for now, at least. Maybe because they nudged them up not too long ago in mid-2024. I remember it like it was yesterday. Well, no, that’s not true—I forget things all the time.
Anyway, who knows where all this is heading. Maybe we’ll just have to start selling homemade cookies to afford our gaming habits soon. A bit dramatic? Perhaps. But hey, a game’s a game. Right?
