Don’t laugh, okay? These words are super serious. Or maybe not? Anyway, I’ve been obsessing over this second trailer for GTA 6 like a moth to a flame—can’t stop myself. Been eyeing it as if I’m waiting for the lunar landing all over again, electrifying Nintendo with pure anticipation. Somehow, it’s still not enough. Like ever. The game drops in May 2026, and here I am, holed up on Mount Chiliad, sifting through every little detail with the precision of a forensic scientist who’s just had too much caffeine.
You’d say we’re done with trailers, wouldn’t you? Two’s plenty, right? But nah, not when a game as big as GTA 6 is looming. It’s the kind of launch that makes history books weep. GTA 5 had its trio of stars, so why not a trio of trailers? I mean, are Rockstar just stringing us along with this twin preview tease?
I find myself just replaying trailer number two, again and again, with this bizarre voice in my head—the highlights are replaying in a loop. Each time, hoping it might whisper some sweet hints about when we’ll finally get to see trailer three.
It starts with a joke. A joke! Should I laugh? I have to because it’s Rockstar poking fun at the leaks. They have us on puppet strings, don’t they? I giggle—like a man dedicated to the cause, heart and soul into unraveling their omnipotent grand plan.
Oh, and there’s a raccoon, sly as anything, emerging from a bin. Google says these critters mate from late January to mid-March. So, is that when trailer three is “born”? Quite likely. Or maybe that’s just me dreaming again.
And then Jason Duval shows up, shirtless. I mean, really. I’m compulsively counting every chest hair the way some people count sheep. Why? I dunno. Science, maybe? I give up pretty quickly ‘cause my brain’s like, “Nope, too hot to handle”. I’m just trying to figure out life, staring at virtual pecs. We’ve all got our hobbies, but really, Jason’s just a bit much.
Next thing, Jason is robbing some store, and there’s a number on the cash register. I scribble it down, dial it up, but nah, silence. I stopped paying my phone bill for seven GTA+ accounts. Seems legit. Actually not legit at all. Ugh.
I resort to, wait for it, math. A lot of numbers add up in strange ways. You don’t even wanna know how my brain went from 3 + 5 to concluding that maybe we’re looking at August 2025 for trailer three. It’s pure mind gymnastics, but come on, it’s gotta mean something, right?
Okay, backtracking… there’s a road sign, exit three to some weird place called Southside Peacock Bay. Exit three? Trailer three? Rockstar’s just showing off and I’m following the breadcrumbs like some lost Hansel.
At some point, Lucia Caminos steps onto the screen, and, well, you can’t help but pause. Her walk, her sway, it’s practically saying “three” with every step. And Jason’s voice like some ghostly whisper, “If we’re doing this, we’re doing it right.” Right? Sure, Jason, sure.
I tell myself all these clues hint at trailer three, despite the chaos in my notes. At this point, logic’s out the window and all I have is this ridiculous hope. And perhaps a mountain of unanswered questions, lurking like NPCs at a party in Vice City.
Random thought, if only the internet were true. Right? Then I wouldn’t have to dive this deep into Rockstar’s wild ride.
